Murdoch
Biomedical Science
soxy_gal@hotmail.com; jac_soxy@yahoo.com.sg
20031987
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Wednesday, March 30, 2005
so freaking fed up wif my bro. juz coz he's gonna slp early today, he's not gonna let me use the internet. he doesnt own tis comp.. its a family comp ok... quarrelled wif him till he gave up. further more he's using the fone at the same time using the comp... stop wasting electricity!
woke up late for jack kor's crit. felt so freaking guilty. wen i reached n found out tt lionel haven present yet, i was relieved yet at the same time felt guilty. i miss my kor's crit!!! argh. promised him the day b4 tt i'll support him.. sorry jack. =( aniway, was in time for lionel's crit... he's was gd lo!! got complimented abt his board... tt it can speak by itself... we were idolising him.. haha.. so farnie.
felt kinda uneasy today. for dunno wad reason. was trying to find out y i wasnt as happy. something at the back of my mind nagging tt something is wrong. but i cant find out wad!! i noe there is.. it'll surface some day... its only a matter of time.
today's jazz dance class was cancelled coz the instructor was sick. they didnt inform me coz they didnt update the contact list. argh. diao. den tw msged me n told me tt mercy relief needs ppl to pack medical supplies to be shipped to indonesia... so decided to go for it. was at kovan, lee hua's place. actually wanted to visit her n see the golden retriever, but she said they're kinda in a mess? sumthing like tt.. cant really remember. was tinking of going over aft the job was done. but aft we finished... was quite late already. called her but she nv ans. so came home instead. so tired. took a pic of myself in the train n saw 2 HUGE eyebags hanging. yeeew.
tmr's going to be a hectic day for me. morning wake up early to type meeting agenda n minutes, den rush over to gess to pass kok how the cumblebands(?), den rush to sp to print the agenda n minutes, den go to audition room to pract for spgg, den have sd meeting. aft sd meeting, gotta rush back home for piano. argh. n i haven pract my exam scales!! oh man...
tw also very funny... asked me out for movie on mon, den in the end also ask jiayi but nv tell me! den he told me someone else already bought tix for us.. i was like huh?? turned out to be jiayi. hehehe.. missed her soo much man. so happy. hehe. oooh yea... we said to meet up every mon since she got leave on mon. hehe.. cant wait to see her on tis coming mon. muax!!
woke up late for jack kor's crit. felt so freaking guilty. wen i reached n found out tt lionel haven present yet, i was relieved yet at the same time felt guilty. i miss my kor's crit!!! argh. promised him the day b4 tt i'll support him.. sorry jack. =( aniway, was in time for lionel's crit... he's was gd lo!! got complimented abt his board... tt it can speak by itself... we were idolising him.. haha.. so farnie.
felt kinda uneasy today. for dunno wad reason. was trying to find out y i wasnt as happy. something at the back of my mind nagging tt something is wrong. but i cant find out wad!! i noe there is.. it'll surface some day... its only a matter of time.
today's jazz dance class was cancelled coz the instructor was sick. they didnt inform me coz they didnt update the contact list. argh. diao. den tw msged me n told me tt mercy relief needs ppl to pack medical supplies to be shipped to indonesia... so decided to go for it. was at kovan, lee hua's place. actually wanted to visit her n see the golden retriever, but she said they're kinda in a mess? sumthing like tt.. cant really remember. was tinking of going over aft the job was done. but aft we finished... was quite late already. called her but she nv ans. so came home instead. so tired. took a pic of myself in the train n saw 2 HUGE eyebags hanging. yeeew.
tmr's going to be a hectic day for me. morning wake up early to type meeting agenda n minutes, den rush over to gess to pass kok how the cumblebands(?), den rush to sp to print the agenda n minutes, den go to audition room to pract for spgg, den have sd meeting. aft sd meeting, gotta rush back home for piano. argh. n i haven pract my exam scales!! oh man...
tw also very funny... asked me out for movie on mon, den in the end also ask jiayi but nv tell me! den he told me someone else already bought tix for us.. i was like huh?? turned out to be jiayi. hehehe.. missed her soo much man. so happy. hehe. oooh yea... we said to meet up every mon since she got leave on mon. hehe.. cant wait to see her on tis coming mon. muax!!
Sunday, March 27, 2005
supposed to be slping now.. but hair still wet.. so bored.. sososos bored. all my conversations had ended... posted yet another stupid qna on the bulletin board.. which i noe no one will be bothered to read. feeling kinda tired.. had sj today.
today was the commissioning of colours. argh. i was YET again.. the DO. argh. i cld have been staying home enjoying life! hee. aniway... trained the nursing GOH once we reached the stadium. was kinda surprised that i cld somehow still remember the commands and which legs the commands fall on, in comparison of how long i've last trained my cadets. aniway, the new sec 1s were there n i cld not regconise them! didnt noe they're frm my sch. so paiseh. they obviously didnt noe me too. owells. was sooo bored during the parade, i rather join... had been long since i've last drilled... find it kinda fun. i'm weird! lolx. S.R Nathan was there... hmm.. so were reporters.. DUH! he's there wad. haha.
juz found out that daniel have gf already. SO PAISEH!! to tink tt i was holding his hand for so long juz now. ARGH!! sorry ah.. daniel's gf.. whoever u are. haha. if i knew abt u, i wld juz shake his hand n let go. but hey.. we're gd frens.. u see? gd FRENS. haha. y am i toking to someone who will not read my blog? hahaha.. siao already. aniway, really glad to see daniel again.. i miss the times wen we hung out together wif royston n samantha!!
haha.. which reminds me of once quite some time ago.. wen glenn asked me out, den wen we met, daniel also asked me out, so i asked him to join me n glenn... den aft sometime, royston ask me out, so i asked him to join daniel, glenn n i. lolx. soo... the 4 of us went out together. so qiao man!! all 3 asked me out on the same day. but kinda felt guilty for glenn, coz he asked me out first... n daniel n royston were toking abt otc, which glenn had nutting to contribute to. kept saying sorry to him, but he very nice one.. hehe. tt's y we're still such frens for so long, yea?! =P
yea aniway, saw daniel last week during the rehearsal. my heart kinda leaped, coz so long nv see him already, den very happy. haha. den today saw him again, heart leaped again... hehe. saw bryan also... heart also leaped. saw melvin also, heart also leaped. ai ya... those i used to know, i saw already, heart leaped. haha. mostly for daniel... coz sooo long nv hang out already lor!!! too bad nv see royston.. heart was also confirm leap very high. haha. samantha also.. ah! i miss her tooooo.. her sch is juz in front of yck stadium n she wasnt there. argh.
okok... enuff of heart leaping or i'll suffer frm heart attack. feeling fatigue filling my eyes n mind.. guess i'll go slp.
today was the commissioning of colours. argh. i was YET again.. the DO. argh. i cld have been staying home enjoying life! hee. aniway... trained the nursing GOH once we reached the stadium. was kinda surprised that i cld somehow still remember the commands and which legs the commands fall on, in comparison of how long i've last trained my cadets. aniway, the new sec 1s were there n i cld not regconise them! didnt noe they're frm my sch. so paiseh. they obviously didnt noe me too. owells. was sooo bored during the parade, i rather join... had been long since i've last drilled... find it kinda fun. i'm weird! lolx. S.R Nathan was there... hmm.. so were reporters.. DUH! he's there wad. haha.
juz found out that daniel have gf already. SO PAISEH!! to tink tt i was holding his hand for so long juz now. ARGH!! sorry ah.. daniel's gf.. whoever u are. haha. if i knew abt u, i wld juz shake his hand n let go. but hey.. we're gd frens.. u see? gd FRENS. haha. y am i toking to someone who will not read my blog? hahaha.. siao already. aniway, really glad to see daniel again.. i miss the times wen we hung out together wif royston n samantha!!
haha.. which reminds me of once quite some time ago.. wen glenn asked me out, den wen we met, daniel also asked me out, so i asked him to join me n glenn... den aft sometime, royston ask me out, so i asked him to join daniel, glenn n i. lolx. soo... the 4 of us went out together. so qiao man!! all 3 asked me out on the same day. but kinda felt guilty for glenn, coz he asked me out first... n daniel n royston were toking abt otc, which glenn had nutting to contribute to. kept saying sorry to him, but he very nice one.. hehe. tt's y we're still such frens for so long, yea?! =P
yea aniway, saw daniel last week during the rehearsal. my heart kinda leaped, coz so long nv see him already, den very happy. haha. den today saw him again, heart leaped again... hehe. saw bryan also... heart also leaped. saw melvin also, heart also leaped. ai ya... those i used to know, i saw already, heart leaped. haha. mostly for daniel... coz sooo long nv hang out already lor!!! too bad nv see royston.. heart was also confirm leap very high. haha. samantha also.. ah! i miss her tooooo.. her sch is juz in front of yck stadium n she wasnt there. argh.
okok... enuff of heart leaping or i'll suffer frm heart attack. feeling fatigue filling my eyes n mind.. guess i'll go slp.
Saturday, March 26, 2005
had hi-tea today wif my family n aunts to celebrate my bday.. which was.. well.. 6 days ago. they had to move it to tis wk coz i was rushing for the toopid major proj last wk. had hi-tea buffet at orchard hotel.. ate quite alot but didnt feel super full coz i took my time. ate a small portion, sat there to chat for a few mins b4 moving on to the nxt serving. my mom taught me tt, said tt u'll be able to eat more but at the same time wun feel like bursting. the food there were great, esp the mango cake n cheesecake.. YUMMY! =)
went shopping wif my parents n aunts. bro left to meet.. i tink his gf... called me aft he left n asked me to inform him if we're going to the waterina, said tt he n his fren-or-gf wld be there, wldnt want my parents to noe. haiz... i'm always helping him in such stuff.. so yep, agreed to it. i understand how it feels getting caught. my parents are merciless!! lolx. aniway, we went abt looking at furnitures and household stuff. cool man... i love looking at such things n imagining them in my new hse... they told me to design my room n give it to the interior designer, but so far no inspiration. cool eh?! design my own room.. wahhaa.. told my mom i wan louvres for my windows.. woo hoo.. love louvres. =P
my aunts left n we went on shopping. i bought 3 tees while my dad bought 2 long-sleeved tees. my mom as usual cant find ani thing tt suites her. she's so picky! well... she always doesnt find the stuff she wants during shopping days.. but will buy loads of stuff on ordinary working days. "gal ah! look! i bought tis shirt/skirt/necklace/earring/wadeva while waiting for pa having a meeting, nice?" diao....
pa actually wanted to get me tis pair of sports slacks for me... but i kinda felt guilty spending so much today.. so yep.. told him mayb some other day. how much did i spend today? tink... $60++... if i were to buy the slacks.. den $110+... too much!!
argh.. tired aft all the shopping. oh yea.. smelled tis guy wearing lionel's cologne. he walked past me n i was tinking,"hey! lionel!" haha... reality check.. lionel's in malaysia gal!! =P
went shopping wif my parents n aunts. bro left to meet.. i tink his gf... called me aft he left n asked me to inform him if we're going to the waterina, said tt he n his fren-or-gf wld be there, wldnt want my parents to noe. haiz... i'm always helping him in such stuff.. so yep, agreed to it. i understand how it feels getting caught. my parents are merciless!! lolx. aniway, we went abt looking at furnitures and household stuff. cool man... i love looking at such things n imagining them in my new hse... they told me to design my room n give it to the interior designer, but so far no inspiration. cool eh?! design my own room.. wahhaa.. told my mom i wan louvres for my windows.. woo hoo.. love louvres. =P
my aunts left n we went on shopping. i bought 3 tees while my dad bought 2 long-sleeved tees. my mom as usual cant find ani thing tt suites her. she's so picky! well... she always doesnt find the stuff she wants during shopping days.. but will buy loads of stuff on ordinary working days. "gal ah! look! i bought tis shirt/skirt/necklace/earring/wadeva while waiting for pa having a meeting, nice?" diao....
pa actually wanted to get me tis pair of sports slacks for me... but i kinda felt guilty spending so much today.. so yep.. told him mayb some other day. how much did i spend today? tink... $60++... if i were to buy the slacks.. den $110+... too much!!
argh.. tired aft all the shopping. oh yea.. smelled tis guy wearing lionel's cologne. he walked past me n i was tinking,"hey! lionel!" haha... reality check.. lionel's in malaysia gal!! =P
Friday, March 25, 2005
so fuuulll... so so so fulll... my appetite's getting so small tis days.
today's my grandma's bday. soooo many of my relatives were there... felt kinda awkward coz had been long since i've seen most of them. owells. aft singing the bday song, went off to meet tw n thomas at ps. AGAIN, felt awkward. if its only meeting tw den i'll be ok, but thomas was there.. dun really tok to him. den he also like dun feel comfortable. aft meeting them, we went to cine to have sushi. didnt really chat wif them coz i didnt noe wad to add into their conversation.. so juz walked nxt to them quietly. awkward man... felt a slightly better once we settled down in suki sushi. had buffet and steamboat... ate till damn full.. aft steamboat, had buffet ice cream. its damn cool man. they turned the bbq wok into a freezing wok. so u juz pour liquified ice cream into the wok to freeze them. scrap them out den eat. super interesting. tw SUPER er xin.. kept playing wif the food. -_-
aft eating, thomas went home while tw n i went on to ps to look at movie timings for robots. most of the movies were sold out there, so we went back to cine. luckily got tix for robots. played arcade while waiting for the movie timing. i won him 2 times in the car racing!!! wahahha... loser. n they say gals cant drive? wahahaha. den we went for robots. the show was damn funny lor!!! laughed till i started coughing... lol! really enjoyed myself. =D
tw poked my side b4 leaving.. i was like, "shit! he found out!" haha.. owell. i'm kinda used to it.
oh yea... used the pink op bag they bought for me. hehehehe!! so nice!! I LOVE U GUYS!! hehe...
today's my grandma's bday. soooo many of my relatives were there... felt kinda awkward coz had been long since i've seen most of them. owells. aft singing the bday song, went off to meet tw n thomas at ps. AGAIN, felt awkward. if its only meeting tw den i'll be ok, but thomas was there.. dun really tok to him. den he also like dun feel comfortable. aft meeting them, we went to cine to have sushi. didnt really chat wif them coz i didnt noe wad to add into their conversation.. so juz walked nxt to them quietly. awkward man... felt a slightly better once we settled down in suki sushi. had buffet and steamboat... ate till damn full.. aft steamboat, had buffet ice cream. its damn cool man. they turned the bbq wok into a freezing wok. so u juz pour liquified ice cream into the wok to freeze them. scrap them out den eat. super interesting. tw SUPER er xin.. kept playing wif the food. -_-
aft eating, thomas went home while tw n i went on to ps to look at movie timings for robots. most of the movies were sold out there, so we went back to cine. luckily got tix for robots. played arcade while waiting for the movie timing. i won him 2 times in the car racing!!! wahahha... loser. n they say gals cant drive? wahahaha. den we went for robots. the show was damn funny lor!!! laughed till i started coughing... lol! really enjoyed myself. =D
tw poked my side b4 leaving.. i was like, "shit! he found out!" haha.. owell. i'm kinda used to it.
oh yea... used the pink op bag they bought for me. hehehehe!! so nice!! I LOVE U GUYS!! hehe...
Thursday, March 24, 2005
my legs are hurtin sooo much. have a total of 4 blisters on my legs. 1 on the back left leg... 3 on the right, 1 at the back and 2 at the top. so painful man.
they went to malaysia already. prob having fun now. so sad.. my parents dun allow. well.. actually i didnt ask them. noe they wun allow aniway.. had been slping over too many times already. n i tink its wrong to ask them wether i can go out.. neeta bring down my temptation to have fun. i noe they're worried for me. =)
went to sch for crs today. den went home aft lunch. fell aslp till 4+ , den went back to sch again for sd. felt like dropping dead on the way to sch. haven really recover frm the slp.. brain was dead.. really really dead.. felt like i was in dreamland.. had a pounding headache. sat in the train stoning, staring at the floor. felt like a dead person walking. weird feeling. felt better wen i got to the mph. they were practicing disco rock.. one of my fav dance. found out i'm better at those bouncy kinda dance, instead of those smooth, swinging dances like salsa, sambal or rumba. but i'm trying my bez to be gd at them too. learnt new variations in disco rock.. the hand movements were confusing.. but really really fun.. daniel n i kept laughing n laughing while practicing. sooo fun.. we had tis craving to perfect the moves.. went on n on. nice! =)
den aft the class... learnt salsa wif daniel, jd n elaine. was sooo confused.. coz i seldom learn e dance. as for daniel n jd, they had outside classes. elaine already learnt frm jd.. so tt leaves me dancing like a blur queen. further more there's sooo many spinning.. felt really dizzy aft every move.. gotta learn to spin properly. was trying to conc, mayb abit too much, daniel pulled me aside n asked if i'm ok. i was like,"huh?!" den he made me rest.. tot i was too tired. owell.... like wad i said previously.. i'm not gd at smooth, suave dances... hope i can be better coz the 4 of us are going to perform salsa in sch. dun wanna bring sd's face down!! =
sd's going for competition on july. alvin kept asking me to join while chatting on the train. felt reluctant.. told him tt i'm afraid i wun be gd enuff. he said daniel n i can join.. i said daniel can dance wif jia hui also. haiz... i dun have the confidence!! sad~
they went to malaysia already. prob having fun now. so sad.. my parents dun allow. well.. actually i didnt ask them. noe they wun allow aniway.. had been slping over too many times already. n i tink its wrong to ask them wether i can go out.. neeta bring down my temptation to have fun. i noe they're worried for me. =)
went to sch for crs today. den went home aft lunch. fell aslp till 4+ , den went back to sch again for sd. felt like dropping dead on the way to sch. haven really recover frm the slp.. brain was dead.. really really dead.. felt like i was in dreamland.. had a pounding headache. sat in the train stoning, staring at the floor. felt like a dead person walking. weird feeling. felt better wen i got to the mph. they were practicing disco rock.. one of my fav dance. found out i'm better at those bouncy kinda dance, instead of those smooth, swinging dances like salsa, sambal or rumba. but i'm trying my bez to be gd at them too. learnt new variations in disco rock.. the hand movements were confusing.. but really really fun.. daniel n i kept laughing n laughing while practicing. sooo fun.. we had tis craving to perfect the moves.. went on n on. nice! =)
den aft the class... learnt salsa wif daniel, jd n elaine. was sooo confused.. coz i seldom learn e dance. as for daniel n jd, they had outside classes. elaine already learnt frm jd.. so tt leaves me dancing like a blur queen. further more there's sooo many spinning.. felt really dizzy aft every move.. gotta learn to spin properly. was trying to conc, mayb abit too much, daniel pulled me aside n asked if i'm ok. i was like,"huh?!" den he made me rest.. tot i was too tired. owell.... like wad i said previously.. i'm not gd at smooth, suave dances... hope i can be better coz the 4 of us are going to perform salsa in sch. dun wanna bring sd's face down!! =
sd's going for competition on july. alvin kept asking me to join while chatting on the train. felt reluctant.. told him tt i'm afraid i wun be gd enuff. he said daniel n i can join.. i said daniel can dance wif jia hui also. haiz... i dun have the confidence!! sad~
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
staring at the screen now... mind shutting off soon. i noe i shld be slping, but its been so long since i last blogged, wanna jot down tis few torturous days, esp yest n today.
submissions's today.. but still not satisfied. there's no feeling of celebration nor is there a release frm burden, felt like i didnt do well, hadnt put in enuff effort, will do badly. had been praying, but like wad pa always say, "God will only help those who help themselves." In a weird way, tis phrase had been driven deep in my mind since young, n its tis phrase that keeps me going. i'm not a God fanatic... but its good to have a force behind me, encouraging me to work on, tis is wad i call faith. dun care wad others tink, everyone have their own philosophy.
Went for sj on sun, which was also my bday. though there were no celebration or gifts wadsoeva, i felt really happy... felt remembered. =) was flooded wif calls n msges, wishing me. my juniors sang me a bday song, didnt expect them to remember, didnt expect them to be so nice to me even though i had scolded them during the training. those hugs were really warm n sweet. love y'all.
didnt slp a wink the night b4 submission. had loads of work left... realised how little i had done. rushed like mad and managed to finish them, but still no satisfaction. owell.. feeling so lethargic now.. mind's shutting down. tmr's crit... not prepared at all... its too soon! i need rest! gonna play bball wif jack n leslie aft my crit.. cant wait!! had been soooo long since i last played. reminiscing back sec sch... wen i played bball everyday during recess and aft sch. those were the days... miss them so much, miss the ppl i had fun wif, miss everyone in sec sch.
submissions's today.. but still not satisfied. there's no feeling of celebration nor is there a release frm burden, felt like i didnt do well, hadnt put in enuff effort, will do badly. had been praying, but like wad pa always say, "God will only help those who help themselves." In a weird way, tis phrase had been driven deep in my mind since young, n its tis phrase that keeps me going. i'm not a God fanatic... but its good to have a force behind me, encouraging me to work on, tis is wad i call faith. dun care wad others tink, everyone have their own philosophy.
Went for sj on sun, which was also my bday. though there were no celebration or gifts wadsoeva, i felt really happy... felt remembered. =) was flooded wif calls n msges, wishing me. my juniors sang me a bday song, didnt expect them to remember, didnt expect them to be so nice to me even though i had scolded them during the training. those hugs were really warm n sweet. love y'all.
didnt slp a wink the night b4 submission. had loads of work left... realised how little i had done. rushed like mad and managed to finish them, but still no satisfaction. owell.. feeling so lethargic now.. mind's shutting down. tmr's crit... not prepared at all... its too soon! i need rest! gonna play bball wif jack n leslie aft my crit.. cant wait!! had been soooo long since i last played. reminiscing back sec sch... wen i played bball everyday during recess and aft sch. those were the days... miss them so much, miss the ppl i had fun wif, miss everyone in sec sch.
Friday, March 18, 2005
tired!! sick sick sick sick sick SICK SICK SICK, BLOODY HELL SICK of ARCHI LIFE!!! SICK OF MS, 3D VIZ, MAKING MODELS, PHOTOSHOP and... WAD EVA TT IS RELATED TO ARCHI WORK!! SICK!!! ARGH! juz wanna drop dead, play dead, slp dead.. juz be a living dead person. argh. so many things to do... so much tots in mind... ah...
less than 4 more days to go for the submission n i'm still so far behind.. goodness.. gotta really work hard. further more there's sj tis sun n i HAVE to go, on my bday!! haiz... planning to tk a cab home once it finishes... which is mostly likely at 7+.. so late!! haiz. cant wait for tis to end.. cant wait for tues.. wing told me he juz wanna slp till tues... den go to sch empty handed.. haha. cute guy man.
cant tink of anithing else tis days... too much work on hand... but i'm sure all hell will break loose in my mind aft the submission. oh well.. at least it keeps my mind active? *shrug* i juz cant wait.. wanna stop tis.. wan to slp peacefully...
less than 4 more days to go for the submission n i'm still so far behind.. goodness.. gotta really work hard. further more there's sj tis sun n i HAVE to go, on my bday!! haiz... planning to tk a cab home once it finishes... which is mostly likely at 7+.. so late!! haiz. cant wait for tis to end.. cant wait for tues.. wing told me he juz wanna slp till tues... den go to sch empty handed.. haha. cute guy man.
cant tink of anithing else tis days... too much work on hand... but i'm sure all hell will break loose in my mind aft the submission. oh well.. at least it keeps my mind active? *shrug* i juz cant wait.. wanna stop tis.. wan to slp peacefully...
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
gh came over to my place today. asked me who my crush was... busybody.. he even went to look thru the pics in my laptop.. -_-.. told him he will nv find out he dun believe. aniway, woke up feeling super hungry, so decided to order canadian pizza to share wif my bro.. *phew* so full.. so full tt it lasted till now. told my mom tt i didnt wan dinner, n she kept telling me to eat... to tink tt she and pa told me tt i'm fat n i need to go on a diet... so STOP TELLING ME TO EAT!! ..... wad kind of parents are they? to actually hurt their daughter so badly wif their words..
aniway... slacked the whole day.. wanted to do my work but cant seem to concentrate.. didnt noe how to start.. i need someone's help.. wanna go over to lee hua's hse.. they're all there.. =( oh well... i hafta learn to be independent.
was browsing thru the pics, yet again, stopped to look at those pics of us.. do i really have something for him? or i'm juz lonely.. argh.. sound so desperate. haha. listening to the songs by fish leong, all love songs.. most of them meaningful.. tot of him again.. one tink tt i like abt tis is tt i dun feel sad or lonely.. neither do i need him badly... tts y i'm juz glad tt we're frens... i'll prob have to cope wif heartbreak if i'm wif him.. relationships are juz something tt waste my time, effort, energy, brain cells and tears... no offence to couples.
aniway... slacked the whole day.. wanted to do my work but cant seem to concentrate.. didnt noe how to start.. i need someone's help.. wanna go over to lee hua's hse.. they're all there.. =( oh well... i hafta learn to be independent.
was browsing thru the pics, yet again, stopped to look at those pics of us.. do i really have something for him? or i'm juz lonely.. argh.. sound so desperate. haha. listening to the songs by fish leong, all love songs.. most of them meaningful.. tot of him again.. one tink tt i like abt tis is tt i dun feel sad or lonely.. neither do i need him badly... tts y i'm juz glad tt we're frens... i'll prob have to cope wif heartbreak if i'm wif him.. relationships are juz something tt waste my time, effort, energy, brain cells and tears... no offence to couples.
Sunday, March 13, 2005
argh.. i cant start on hta... typed 2 paragraphs only when my mind starts to go wild.. cant stop smiling.. cant stop tinking.. so i msged him.. hehe. guess i still have something for him.. =) but owell.. gotta move on yea? juz glad tt its tis way.
had been tinking abt it. have i developed a crush on him? i hope not... had been browsing thru my pics and cant help to stop n look at him. of all ppl.. him? tts weird. but nah.. shant spoil our frenship.. once again.. juz glad tt its tis way.
i hope no one goes into stupid conclusions aft reading tis. get ur facts rite yea ppl? thnx.
had been tinking abt it. have i developed a crush on him? i hope not... had been browsing thru my pics and cant help to stop n look at him. of all ppl.. him? tts weird. but nah.. shant spoil our frenship.. once again.. juz glad tt its tis way.
i hope no one goes into stupid conclusions aft reading tis. get ur facts rite yea ppl? thnx.
finally home.. feeling soo tired.
was supposed to play bball yest but leslie cancelled it coz he felt too knocked out due to fri night's drink. i was super knocked out man. aft leslie called, was still feeling drowsy, had a little headache. told me tt he cancelled the game, felt super relieved. woke up at 1+. den went to glenn's hse.
felt soo shy at his place. his grandma, grandpa and sis were there. they actually knew tt i'm coming n his grandma included me for lunch. didnt want to be rude by rejecting although i felt super full already. ate till my stomach also exploded. haha. his sis really cute.. very polite also.. very very well behaved for a 9 yr old. pretty too.. =)
aft eating, taught glenn how to play the piano. super difficult sia... dun tink i can be a piano teacher.. i dun have the patience! but was really nice to see tt he was determined to learn.. played the piece again n again. i dun have tt much patience to play the piece soo many times wif soo many mistakes. was pretty amazed while watching him pract. =)
played variations in canon for him to listen, goodness.. terrible.. had been too long since i last played tt piece. was super jerky though its a smooth piece. super disappointed man. haiz. den his parents came back home.. again.. felt super paiseh. had dinner wif them.. they kept filling up my plate.. was super full lor! almost puked while eating them. the lunch in my stomach had not been fully digested n i had to eat more. goodness. was the last one to leave the dinning table. i cant reject them rite?! its rude.... so... stuffed myself up.. finished the whole plate. argh.
den went to his room to watch tv. fell alsp on his bed. woke up shivering and weak. sumthing wrong wif me tis days. helped him write the scores of cannon, coz he wanted to learn. den taught him how to play. kinda impatient.. mayb coz i juz woke up. den his mom super nice lor!! gave me 10bucks for taxi fare. kaoz.. was soo shocked.. but.. again.. haiz.. felt rude to reject her. ai yo.
reached home, slacked, den slp. woke up tis morning to meet lionel to pass me sumthing, den jia hui. had to discuss wif her abt SD's script. sat in macs for abt 2 hrs. den went shopping. wanted to faint man.. felt super super weak.. den shop till her fren come, finally get to come home.
tink i write too much already. ciao
was supposed to play bball yest but leslie cancelled it coz he felt too knocked out due to fri night's drink. i was super knocked out man. aft leslie called, was still feeling drowsy, had a little headache. told me tt he cancelled the game, felt super relieved. woke up at 1+. den went to glenn's hse.
felt soo shy at his place. his grandma, grandpa and sis were there. they actually knew tt i'm coming n his grandma included me for lunch. didnt want to be rude by rejecting although i felt super full already. ate till my stomach also exploded. haha. his sis really cute.. very polite also.. very very well behaved for a 9 yr old. pretty too.. =)
aft eating, taught glenn how to play the piano. super difficult sia... dun tink i can be a piano teacher.. i dun have the patience! but was really nice to see tt he was determined to learn.. played the piece again n again. i dun have tt much patience to play the piece soo many times wif soo many mistakes. was pretty amazed while watching him pract. =)
played variations in canon for him to listen, goodness.. terrible.. had been too long since i last played tt piece. was super jerky though its a smooth piece. super disappointed man. haiz. den his parents came back home.. again.. felt super paiseh. had dinner wif them.. they kept filling up my plate.. was super full lor! almost puked while eating them. the lunch in my stomach had not been fully digested n i had to eat more. goodness. was the last one to leave the dinning table. i cant reject them rite?! its rude.... so... stuffed myself up.. finished the whole plate. argh.
den went to his room to watch tv. fell alsp on his bed. woke up shivering and weak. sumthing wrong wif me tis days. helped him write the scores of cannon, coz he wanted to learn. den taught him how to play. kinda impatient.. mayb coz i juz woke up. den his mom super nice lor!! gave me 10bucks for taxi fare. kaoz.. was soo shocked.. but.. again.. haiz.. felt rude to reject her. ai yo.
reached home, slacked, den slp. woke up tis morning to meet lionel to pass me sumthing, den jia hui. had to discuss wif her abt SD's script. sat in macs for abt 2 hrs. den went shopping. wanted to faint man.. felt super super weak.. den shop till her fren come, finally get to come home.
tink i write too much already. ciao
Saturday, March 12, 2005
was it real? did it really happen? or was it a dream? did he really apologise? did i really forgive him? God... thank God... oh man... THANK GOD!!! *muax muax muax muax muax*!! oh man... its over.. finally over... oh man... rest my soul... had nv been happier for so long... feel like crying.. happy tears. =)
was the wave concert yest. quite ok.. was sooo happy aft the whole thing ended. my dance piece wasnt tt bad. =) haiz.. all the hard work had paid off. jiaying dar was there.. hehe.. so happy to see her... bleah. oh yea.. SORRY DAR if i left u out the whole time at the pub.. SORRY! i love u yea? =)
went to union square wif my classmates n andrewaft the concert. so fun.. hehe.. drank quite alot.. danced alot too... so fun.. hehe.. teached some of them how to dance salsa.. hehe.. virly so paiseh, didnt wanna dance.. lolx.. so cute sia. andrew also so funny wen i tried to teach him. lolx. ahhh.. so fun...
glad tt i was there... glad tt it happened... was tis all planned by God? planned tt we will have tis party? planned tt i will be there even though i was feeling tired n sore? was it all planned? =) gotta thank God again..
was the wave concert yest. quite ok.. was sooo happy aft the whole thing ended. my dance piece wasnt tt bad. =) haiz.. all the hard work had paid off. jiaying dar was there.. hehe.. so happy to see her... bleah. oh yea.. SORRY DAR if i left u out the whole time at the pub.. SORRY! i love u yea? =)
went to union square wif my classmates n andrewaft the concert. so fun.. hehe.. drank quite alot.. danced alot too... so fun.. hehe.. teached some of them how to dance salsa.. hehe.. virly so paiseh, didnt wanna dance.. lolx.. so cute sia. andrew also so funny wen i tried to teach him. lolx. ahhh.. so fun...
glad tt i was there... glad tt it happened... was tis all planned by God? planned tt we will have tis party? planned tt i will be there even though i was feeling tired n sore? was it all planned? =) gotta thank God again..
Thursday, March 10, 2005
stonez...
juz woke up.. so stoney now.. ah.. had been overnighting at lion's place wif jack, mark, ivonny and rf. mark didnt slp at all... again. bez. we decided to skip LC aft realising tt its useless to go for the class. thnk god. ah.. so stonez...
was sooo surprised tt my mom allowed me to stay overnight. to tink tt i was so scared to ask her. tis is the only thing i'm afraid to approach my mom abt. ppl always ask,"wad are u so afraid of?!" have my reasons bhind it. if they hear the reason, they'll understand. too bad they'll nv hear abt it.
better get to work. still got so much to do.
was sooo surprised tt my mom allowed me to stay overnight. to tink tt i was so scared to ask her. tis is the only thing i'm afraid to approach my mom abt. ppl always ask,"wad are u so afraid of?!" have my reasons bhind it. if they hear the reason, they'll understand. too bad they'll nv hear abt it.
better get to work. still got so much to do.
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
moody~
argh... so fed up.. yet again, i didnt dance at all.. waited the whole day n in the end they didnt have the time to dance my piece. was so fed up. left straight away, didnt even bother to wait for lionel and the rest to go home together. was msging jack and complaining.. den somehow it got to other stuff... den started to cry on the way home. totally suck man. was kinda guilty for complaining to jack, tink i affected his mood too. hate it wen i affect someone's mood coz of me. =( sorry jack... tink i lionel was kinda fed up wif me coz i left without informing him. argh. feel so bad... feel like giving them each a hug. not in a loving way tt is.. a friendly hug.
went home and fell aslp.. yet again, i didnt do my work. haiz. den woke up in the morning feeling very very drained. wanted to skip ES but in the end decided not to, had been skipping too many lessons. going to lionel's hse to do my work later at night, cant do alone... will slp again. haiz.. wads wrong wif me?!
went home and fell aslp.. yet again, i didnt do my work. haiz. den woke up in the morning feeling very very drained. wanted to skip ES but in the end decided not to, had been skipping too many lessons. going to lionel's hse to do my work later at night, cant do alone... will slp again. haiz.. wads wrong wif me?!
Monday, March 07, 2005
tired... sick...
so tired... came back frm dance... tired!!!! ahhh... everyday also got pract... coz tis fri is my performance already.. ah!!! tired...
toking to vir and megat abt it now... feeling so agitated.. juz feel like screaming. bursting my lungs, throat... screaming till blood flows out of my eyes instead of tears... screaming till my heart stops. feel like crying again.. but NO! i shall not... i've cried enuff... NO MORE CRYING! its not worth wasting my tears.
sometimes i'm juz so sick to try to get things back to normal. like the saying goes.. it takes 2 hands to clap. they told me to try.. ohh.. juz try... i tink u guys shld tok abt it privately.. wad if the other party is unwilling to? i've tried.. i've talked... i'm sick of facing the same attitude over n over again.. i'm tired of trying. its over... i shant try animore.. i'll juz let it rest.. let it be... i'll juz ignore.. everyone, everything has a limit... as far as i'm concerned.. my limit has been reached. i'll prob explode if i push even further. sorry.
toking to vir and megat abt it now... feeling so agitated.. juz feel like screaming. bursting my lungs, throat... screaming till blood flows out of my eyes instead of tears... screaming till my heart stops. feel like crying again.. but NO! i shall not... i've cried enuff... NO MORE CRYING! its not worth wasting my tears.
sometimes i'm juz so sick to try to get things back to normal. like the saying goes.. it takes 2 hands to clap. they told me to try.. ohh.. juz try... i tink u guys shld tok abt it privately.. wad if the other party is unwilling to? i've tried.. i've talked... i'm sick of facing the same attitude over n over again.. i'm tired of trying. its over... i shant try animore.. i'll juz let it rest.. let it be... i'll juz ignore.. everyone, everything has a limit... as far as i'm concerned.. my limit has been reached. i'll prob explode if i push even further. sorry.
teeheee.. gay pub
yest went to watch aterballeto at esplanade... so nice... their body so nice n perfect!!! ahh. so envious. they sooo flexible also.. ahh... so inspired wen i was watching them
so sad man.. i was separated wif the others coz i bought the tix at a diff time. although was only sitted 2 sits away... but there was an isle in the middle.. i was on the other side of the isle. ahhhh.. so suey.
b4 the show, was taking pix wif kenneth and lionel. hehehe.. so happy. first time tk pix wif him. hehe. so happy. the pix look gd also. hehe. my classmates saw n they were teasing me abt it. hehe. was blushing like shit.
aft the show went to meet jack wif lionel to go to xpose... a gay pub!! ahahhaha... first time go to gay pub. so er xin.. saw tis 2 guy hugging. omg. but they all very ugly.. so i tink they got hurt by gals too many times tt they decided to go crooked. haha. took alot of pix.. very nice.. got one i wear sunglasses.. very nice.. hehe.. slack, drank at the pub till arnd 1+ den mom called.. nag nag.. so i left aft sometime.
its not affecting me animore!! i so happy.. feel so carefree at last. miss tis feeling. hehe.. juz glad tt i can have fun wif my close frens. =)
so sad man.. i was separated wif the others coz i bought the tix at a diff time. although was only sitted 2 sits away... but there was an isle in the middle.. i was on the other side of the isle. ahhhh.. so suey.
b4 the show, was taking pix wif kenneth and lionel. hehehe.. so happy. first time tk pix wif him. hehe. so happy. the pix look gd also. hehe. my classmates saw n they were teasing me abt it. hehe. was blushing like shit.
aft the show went to meet jack wif lionel to go to xpose... a gay pub!! ahahhaha... first time go to gay pub. so er xin.. saw tis 2 guy hugging. omg. but they all very ugly.. so i tink they got hurt by gals too many times tt they decided to go crooked. haha. took alot of pix.. very nice.. got one i wear sunglasses.. very nice.. hehe.. slack, drank at the pub till arnd 1+ den mom called.. nag nag.. so i left aft sometime.
its not affecting me animore!! i so happy.. feel so carefree at last. miss tis feeling. hehe.. juz glad tt i can have fun wif my close frens. =)
Sunday, March 06, 2005
hitch
currently flossing my teeth.. sooo fed up, the floss kept breaking... had to use another n another. took soo long b4 i cld get the irritating piece stuck in my teeth. haha.. jack staying at lionel's hse... juz told me tt nammi cut his hair, look like a hairless sheep.. lolx.. so cute. wanna stay at his hse too.. bleah... too bad cant.. parents dun allow. oh well.
went to facial in the aftnoon today.. so painful~!! den my face so red... haiz.. so ugly. oh well.. i'm always ugly. went to meet the farktards at ps. watched hitch. hehe.. funny show man.. totally loved will smith. the gal so pretty.. looked abit like cindy crawford, coz of her mole.. hee. andrew left right aft the show.. so fast man.. expected him to hang arnd abit more. oh well..
virly n megat left aft dinner. den we planned to play bowling at cine, bowling alley closed, go look at kpool, too many ppl... so in the end didnt noe where to go. lazed arnd.. finally decided to go meridien to sit down n drink.. on the way, changed our mind to go je to play pool, while jon n his frens went on to meridien. haiz.. wanted to cry while walking to the mrt... felt really upset aft ivonny told me sumthing.. felt tis heavy rock inside me...
aniway.. felt better at je. played tis picture search wif ivonny, rf and lionel while mark and jack went to play billiard. so fun... we got one of the top scorers. hee. den lionel and i opened a pool table to play. jack and mark joined us, den ivonny and rf went home. played till 2+am... was kinda upset... but it didnt affect me much. i always have fun arnd my archi frens.. =)
mark cld tell tt something's wrong wif me.. kept asking me wads wrong... was hinting me n all.. like,"i'm ur fren.. u're my fren.. so... we can share our tots once in a while yea?" lolx.. was kinda amused. but of coz didnt tell him la. not my confidante.
so weird... while at orchard, suddenly missed so many ppl.. for dunno wad reason. missed jiayi, jiaying, glenn, gh(yew, also dunno y), tian wen(say wanna join us for pool in the end back out, hmph), hb(weird huh, but tot of him while at cine kpool, coz saw him once there), buvan, vanitha, zhi yang(also dunno y.. guess i miss playing bball wif him)... n some others.. cant really tink animore. dunno la.. missed them alot.. missed having those happy, carefree, crazy, hysterical, funny times we had. i dun seem to be able to get these animore, wif tt currently at the back of my mind all the time.
wenjun toking to me.. want so much to shut him up.. but feel really bad to ignore him.. so giving him nonchalant anses once in a while. said actually he tired, but saw me online, so stayed up to chat wif me, coz so long nv chat already. ai yo.. so irritated wif him.. argh, shuddup. ai yo. someone help me.
gh said he was in the same cinema as i was juz now. so shocked to noe tt. luckily nv see him. eeks. so bad.
went to facial in the aftnoon today.. so painful~!! den my face so red... haiz.. so ugly. oh well.. i'm always ugly. went to meet the farktards at ps. watched hitch. hehe.. funny show man.. totally loved will smith. the gal so pretty.. looked abit like cindy crawford, coz of her mole.. hee. andrew left right aft the show.. so fast man.. expected him to hang arnd abit more. oh well..
virly n megat left aft dinner. den we planned to play bowling at cine, bowling alley closed, go look at kpool, too many ppl... so in the end didnt noe where to go. lazed arnd.. finally decided to go meridien to sit down n drink.. on the way, changed our mind to go je to play pool, while jon n his frens went on to meridien. haiz.. wanted to cry while walking to the mrt... felt really upset aft ivonny told me sumthing.. felt tis heavy rock inside me...
aniway.. felt better at je. played tis picture search wif ivonny, rf and lionel while mark and jack went to play billiard. so fun... we got one of the top scorers. hee. den lionel and i opened a pool table to play. jack and mark joined us, den ivonny and rf went home. played till 2+am... was kinda upset... but it didnt affect me much. i always have fun arnd my archi frens.. =)
mark cld tell tt something's wrong wif me.. kept asking me wads wrong... was hinting me n all.. like,"i'm ur fren.. u're my fren.. so... we can share our tots once in a while yea?" lolx.. was kinda amused. but of coz didnt tell him la. not my confidante.
so weird... while at orchard, suddenly missed so many ppl.. for dunno wad reason. missed jiayi, jiaying, glenn, gh(yew, also dunno y), tian wen(say wanna join us for pool in the end back out, hmph), hb(weird huh, but tot of him while at cine kpool, coz saw him once there), buvan, vanitha, zhi yang(also dunno y.. guess i miss playing bball wif him)... n some others.. cant really tink animore. dunno la.. missed them alot.. missed having those happy, carefree, crazy, hysterical, funny times we had. i dun seem to be able to get these animore, wif tt currently at the back of my mind all the time.
wenjun toking to me.. want so much to shut him up.. but feel really bad to ignore him.. so giving him nonchalant anses once in a while. said actually he tired, but saw me online, so stayed up to chat wif me, coz so long nv chat already. ai yo.. so irritated wif him.. argh, shuddup. ai yo. someone help me.
gh said he was in the same cinema as i was juz now. so shocked to noe tt. luckily nv see him. eeks. so bad.
Saturday, March 05, 2005
i can finally come online~!!!
ahahahahah~!!!!!!! yea!!!!!!!!!! the new comp is finally up! thnx to my bro.. i can come online~! teeeheeee.... oooh. look at the time.. 4.20am. lolx.
really bored of life tis days. bored of archi life, bored of everything. nutting seems to interest me animore.. not even cha cha. not a gd sign for not being interested in my beloved. he's still cute.. as cute as ever.. but i've been giving him lesser n lesser attention. he dun seem to like me animore either. kinda sad.
sch today.. or rather.. yesterday was boring. freaking boring. was chatting wif gh wayyy late, till arnd 3am, b4 i fell alsp. was actually planning to chat wif him till 6am, den i'll prep for sch. but was too tired to cont, so put down the fone. he confessed to me... i heard it.. but pretended tt i didnt. was like,"wad did u say?".. den i tink he didnt want to repeat.. so said nutting. was relieved tt he didnt say it again. thnk god. welll.. yea.. slpt like a pig till 8.45.. jumped out of bed only to realise i'm late for hta. so.. since i'm already sooo late, i took my time to prep for sch. reached sch like.. i tink 9.45... the first thing leslie said to me was,"wah.. y ur eye swollen?" gave him a nonchalant ans den joined the others at fc1, had only fruits. as usual.. cldnt finish em, gave the remaining half to jack.
on the way back to the studio, so funny... coz virly and megat were holding hands... lionel and i were bhind them... den we held hands also, to tease them la. lolx. siao already. but hor... at the back of my head, was feeling reaaaaallly awkward. like... yewwwwwww, i wanna let go of his hand! lolx. so bad.
slacked in the studio for a reaaallly long time.. was waiting for 1 for my gems. so bored man. wanted to do my work but didnt have the mood to. so.. slack until my mood turned bad.. again. jack came to chat wif me... but like still no mood. haiz. finally went for gems... gems also soo bloody boring.. wad stupid magic squares... slpt thruout the whole class. luckily it ended early, 2 instead of 3. was soo relieved to get out of the class. went back to the studio, mood still bad. so.. didnt wanna affect the others wif my mood, went to the back to slpt. slp till i tink 3+, felt realllly cold, so went outside to sit at the steps. den really cannot tahan.. too bored already, went back to the studio and packed my bag aft hearing tt jack wanna leave too. den we went home together.
came home, felt sooo freaking tired, so went to slp straight away... slp, slp slp until 2+am. heard my bro using the comp, came out of my room... den slacked in the living room until now. bored la. life really very boring. freaking bored. haiz. m and v said they're not eyebags, they're cry bags. felt really weird wen they said tt. didnt wanna acknowledge it.. though i noe tts the truth. tried to ignore wad they said.
going out wif my classmates later in the evening. so cool man.. 14 ppl altogether. cant imagine a huge crowd of 14 ppl walking down orchard rd together. so many man~! andrew also joining us. was sooo shocked tt he agreed in coming wen i invited him. expected him to say no. den i asked if he wanna ask his fiance. den he was like so paiseh leh~! haha.. so funny.. den he said if wanna go watch movie wif her, y muz go wif so many ppl? muz go alone mah. lolx. first time see him blush.. so funny. cant wait. hee. going to watch hitch. so cool man. hee.
really bored of life tis days. bored of archi life, bored of everything. nutting seems to interest me animore.. not even cha cha. not a gd sign for not being interested in my beloved. he's still cute.. as cute as ever.. but i've been giving him lesser n lesser attention. he dun seem to like me animore either. kinda sad.
sch today.. or rather.. yesterday was boring. freaking boring. was chatting wif gh wayyy late, till arnd 3am, b4 i fell alsp. was actually planning to chat wif him till 6am, den i'll prep for sch. but was too tired to cont, so put down the fone. he confessed to me... i heard it.. but pretended tt i didnt. was like,"wad did u say?".. den i tink he didnt want to repeat.. so said nutting. was relieved tt he didnt say it again. thnk god. welll.. yea.. slpt like a pig till 8.45.. jumped out of bed only to realise i'm late for hta. so.. since i'm already sooo late, i took my time to prep for sch. reached sch like.. i tink 9.45... the first thing leslie said to me was,"wah.. y ur eye swollen?" gave him a nonchalant ans den joined the others at fc1, had only fruits. as usual.. cldnt finish em, gave the remaining half to jack.
on the way back to the studio, so funny... coz virly and megat were holding hands... lionel and i were bhind them... den we held hands also, to tease them la. lolx. siao already. but hor... at the back of my head, was feeling reaaaaallly awkward. like... yewwwwwww, i wanna let go of his hand! lolx. so bad.
slacked in the studio for a reaaallly long time.. was waiting for 1 for my gems. so bored man. wanted to do my work but didnt have the mood to. so.. slack until my mood turned bad.. again. jack came to chat wif me... but like still no mood. haiz. finally went for gems... gems also soo bloody boring.. wad stupid magic squares... slpt thruout the whole class. luckily it ended early, 2 instead of 3. was soo relieved to get out of the class. went back to the studio, mood still bad. so.. didnt wanna affect the others wif my mood, went to the back to slpt. slp till i tink 3+, felt realllly cold, so went outside to sit at the steps. den really cannot tahan.. too bored already, went back to the studio and packed my bag aft hearing tt jack wanna leave too. den we went home together.
came home, felt sooo freaking tired, so went to slp straight away... slp, slp slp until 2+am. heard my bro using the comp, came out of my room... den slacked in the living room until now. bored la. life really very boring. freaking bored. haiz. m and v said they're not eyebags, they're cry bags. felt really weird wen they said tt. didnt wanna acknowledge it.. though i noe tts the truth. tried to ignore wad they said.
going out wif my classmates later in the evening. so cool man.. 14 ppl altogether. cant imagine a huge crowd of 14 ppl walking down orchard rd together. so many man~! andrew also joining us. was sooo shocked tt he agreed in coming wen i invited him. expected him to say no. den i asked if he wanna ask his fiance. den he was like so paiseh leh~! haha.. so funny.. den he said if wanna go watch movie wif her, y muz go wif so many ppl? muz go alone mah. lolx. first time see him blush.. so funny. cant wait. hee. going to watch hitch. so cool man. hee.
Thursday, March 03, 2005
sad again...
felt like crying.. again... during social dance.
ivonny and lionel were toking abt it and somehow it got me really sad.
walked away to dance b4 my tears start to flow.
luckily daniel came to dance wif me.
felt so much more better concentrating on something
dunno wads wrong wif me
like wad lionel said,"its all over"
y am i still tinking abt it?
jiaying's nick,"some of us think that holding on makes us strong but sometimes it is letting go."
got me tinking, shld i let go? i'm trying to... but i cant
jack said,"its mind over matter"
haiz... its juz so hard.
gotta do it. gonna move on.
ivonny and lionel were toking abt it and somehow it got me really sad.
walked away to dance b4 my tears start to flow.
luckily daniel came to dance wif me.
felt so much more better concentrating on something
dunno wads wrong wif me
like wad lionel said,"its all over"
y am i still tinking abt it?
jiaying's nick,"some of us think that holding on makes us strong but sometimes it is letting go."
got me tinking, shld i let go? i'm trying to... but i cant
jack said,"its mind over matter"
haiz... its juz so hard.
gotta do it. gonna move on.
snore
jiaying dar came to sch yest. so happy.. so long nv see her already. said she fat already... more like she thin already lor. ai ya.. she's always saying she's fat.. buey tahan. was kinda shocked wen i found out tt she knew leslie long ago... n tt guy whom we saw at the arcade loooong time ago was him. he changed sooo much! omg.
got scolded so much during piano for my scales. oh well.. expected... got no time to pract man.
didnt tink abt it last night... tot abt it tis morning.. didnt really affect me much. surprisingly.. guess tt's hope.
got scolded so much during piano for my scales. oh well.. expected... got no time to pract man.
didnt tink abt it last night... tot abt it tis morning.. didnt really affect me much. surprisingly.. guess tt's hope.
Wednesday, March 02, 2005
cry~
cried 2 days in a role.. goodness... tink i'll go blind some day. cried while walking home the day b4... den cried last night aft toking to gh. didnt noe y i cried aft toking to him... he kinda raked up the past... den emotions juz came... den cried. he said he cried too, but didnt really believe him, coz he didnt sound like he cried. *shrug* cant believe wad he said to me, felt empty... too bad, he missed his chance... didnt treasure me in the first place wen i was still mad abt him. said tt he missed me and all... put the fone away wen he started.. didnt wanna hear abt it... felt sick abt it. no way will i get back to him. he changed too much. chat till 3+, den fell alsp wif the fone still in my hand.
yest was fun while going back wif kenneth. cairu, him and me were teasing each other. was really fun. cairu said tt she has been rejecting ppl coz she already has someone in mind. cld tell tt it was kenneth. like soooo obvious. -_-" den kenneth was teasing me abt lionel. so irritating man... he called me lionel instead of my name. wanted to shut him off... wanna say like,"not lionel la! u're the one i admire!!" lolx. of coz i nv say la.
yest went wif ivonny to city hall. met the ang moh on the way to dover. den we sat the same carriage on the mrt. hehehe. den i sat nxt to him. hehehe..!! so funny man.. dunno y i kept laughing... ivonny was sitting directly opp me.. also laughing. lolx. den we took pics of him while he was slping. i pretended tking pics of myself... but was taking him la. den ivonny pretended taking pics of me. lolx. funny~~~~
felt really terrible wen i woke up tis morning. wanted to cry again. but didnt. tink i cried too much. was tinking abt wad gh told me last night. felt really sick once i tot abt it. den i tot abt him... heart ached.. again... haiz....
yest was fun while going back wif kenneth. cairu, him and me were teasing each other. was really fun. cairu said tt she has been rejecting ppl coz she already has someone in mind. cld tell tt it was kenneth. like soooo obvious. -_-" den kenneth was teasing me abt lionel. so irritating man... he called me lionel instead of my name. wanted to shut him off... wanna say like,"not lionel la! u're the one i admire!!" lolx. of coz i nv say la.
yest went wif ivonny to city hall. met the ang moh on the way to dover. den we sat the same carriage on the mrt. hehehe. den i sat nxt to him. hehehe..!! so funny man.. dunno y i kept laughing... ivonny was sitting directly opp me.. also laughing. lolx. den we took pics of him while he was slping. i pretended tking pics of myself... but was taking him la. den ivonny pretended taking pics of me. lolx. funny~~~~
felt really terrible wen i woke up tis morning. wanted to cry again. but didnt. tink i cried too much. was tinking abt wad gh told me last night. felt really sick once i tot abt it. den i tot abt him... heart ached.. again... haiz....