Murdoch
Biomedical Science
soxy_gal@hotmail.com; jac_soxy@yahoo.com.sg
20031987
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Sunday, May 29, 2005
ok sch starts tmr n i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared or not. had been waiting for tis day to come.. b4 the camp.. but aft the FOC camp, getting to know so many more frens, my body tells me i need more hols. my eyes are feeling tired, lenses still on, but i still refuse to take them off, knowing tt i'll feel slpy once my eyes are comfortable. dun wanna slp... dun wan tmr to come... but it will sooner or later, so y dun u juz give up sy? yep.. i've decided to stop chatting on msn, finish up wif tis entry, i go straight to slp. =P
went for the SOKA dance today. as usual.. forgotten the steps n was following the special grp blindly. argh. had been telling myself i cant cont following tis way, n tt i wun be able to remember. so.. tot of the steps... got stuck. tot of them again, got stuck again. argh. i only remembered the couple dance. its soo simple. hm... but to tink of it, the whole dance is easy. O_0
went home, washed up, n met des at ps. watched starwars!! YES! fiiinaaally. i've asked like a zillion frens. some either watched it already, or are not interested. thnk God i have des. haha. the show was great man. totally looove it. yoda is soo cute! everytime his scene comes on, i juz cant help but smile. CUTE! esp wen he fights. tis tiny little thing jumping arnd. CUTE. hee. wen walking, he needs a stick to support, but wen he starts fighting, BOOM! he jumps arnd like he's legs are attached wif springs(?). ironic. =P
went for dinner wif ivonny at clementi. saw zhaoming wif his mom. he looked surprised once seeing me. we went shopping aft dinner. bought a tee. den went ntuc, saw zhaoming again. so qiao man.
bought 2 new tees today. 1 wif des, 1 wif ivonny. yea!! haha.
hope sch will go fine tmr.
went for the SOKA dance today. as usual.. forgotten the steps n was following the special grp blindly. argh. had been telling myself i cant cont following tis way, n tt i wun be able to remember. so.. tot of the steps... got stuck. tot of them again, got stuck again. argh. i only remembered the couple dance. its soo simple. hm... but to tink of it, the whole dance is easy. O_0
went home, washed up, n met des at ps. watched starwars!! YES! fiiinaaally. i've asked like a zillion frens. some either watched it already, or are not interested. thnk God i have des. haha. the show was great man. totally looove it. yoda is soo cute! everytime his scene comes on, i juz cant help but smile. CUTE! esp wen he fights. tis tiny little thing jumping arnd. CUTE. hee. wen walking, he needs a stick to support, but wen he starts fighting, BOOM! he jumps arnd like he's legs are attached wif springs(?). ironic. =P
went for dinner wif ivonny at clementi. saw zhaoming wif his mom. he looked surprised once seeing me. we went shopping aft dinner. bought a tee. den went ntuc, saw zhaoming again. so qiao man.
bought 2 new tees today. 1 wif des, 1 wif ivonny. yea!! haha.
hope sch will go fine tmr.
Friday, May 27, 2005
i hate having my family at home. hate it~~~~ seriously hate it!!! be surprised.. but i enjoy juz being alone at home, doing my own stuff.. w/o all the distractions. damn. mayb i've been left alone at home too many times, till it bcums part of my life. wad eva it is, wenever their home, i juz wish to hide in my room. y cant i use the net on my laptop?! y the hell muz i share the freaking desktop wif my bro?! ARGHH!!!
my day had been tiring enuff n they HAD to add into my frustrations. stressed out tt i had to type the safety details by tonight.. n my FREAKING BRO had to bother me. how dare he shout at me. FUCK!! ARGH! bloody hell used vulgarities at me. argh. cant u see i'm doing some work?! FINE... use the freaking comp. damn it. hope the radiation will damage ur freaking brain.
bloody hell. freak angry. n WOW, my mom HAD to say sumthing. FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!! ARRRRGGGHH! LIKE JUZ FUCK OFF!! cant wait to go overseas man.
thnk God for lionel and jason chatting to me on msn. they kinda brought down my anger. but aft going off, anger juz exploded into my heart. anger frustration irritation hurt juz spilled in. fuck man.
haiz.. sorry.. mind my language.
my day had been tiring enuff n they HAD to add into my frustrations. stressed out tt i had to type the safety details by tonight.. n my FREAKING BRO had to bother me. how dare he shout at me. FUCK!! ARGH! bloody hell used vulgarities at me. argh. cant u see i'm doing some work?! FINE... use the freaking comp. damn it. hope the radiation will damage ur freaking brain.
bloody hell. freak angry. n WOW, my mom HAD to say sumthing. FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!! ARRRRGGGHH! LIKE JUZ FUCK OFF!! cant wait to go overseas man.
thnk God for lionel and jason chatting to me on msn. they kinda brought down my anger. but aft going off, anger juz exploded into my heart. anger frustration irritation hurt juz spilled in. fuck man.
haiz.. sorry.. mind my language.
Thursday, May 26, 2005
phew.. i'm soo burnt on the face. but not as bad as the others like tong jue or jackson or lionel. tong jue's the worst, she look like a decomposing grandma, not exaggerating! went to sentosa on mon wif the DE peeps. boy did we have fun man. i was super hyper. did stone once in a while due to exhaustion, but recovered fast. was entertained by lionel bringing the 1.5 bottle arnd, squirting water into ppl's face. somehow i found it amusing. everytime he aimed at sumone, i wld burst out into wild laughter. it was sooo amusing!! hehe. i LOVVVEE hanging out wif the DE club peeps now.. they're so much fun! DE RULEZ~! =)
met up wif ivonny yest. boy did i miss her~! she was shopping, as usual, at clementi. had soo much to catch up. told her wad happened, gossipped... hehehe. =P
today's sooo hectic. super hectic. but i had fun still. met up wif the helpers n GLs in the DE club hse in the morning, slacked for awhile n proceeded to the auditorium. we were helping out in the DE orientation. gave out forms for the freshies. went crazy during the break. was cheering... saboing umar the bday boy... billy banja-ing... hehe. aft it all, slacked even more in the club hse. most of them went to orchard. booo~!! sooo sad, cldnt join them. made them promise tt they wun watch starwars, n tt wen i'm free, they will watch it wif me. HEHEHE~! soo bad. had a light lunch wif lionel, tong jue, wee soon n the freshies. den off i went for social dance.
went crazy during the dance.. hehe.. was singing the new DE cheer. they said nxt time they better prevent me frm going for animore camps. hahaha. but wad to do? i juz simply LOVE DE~! hehe. aft social dance, was the SOKA dance at boon lay. was freaking tired there man, juz cldnt wait to get home. but going home wasnt my plan for the day.. clubbing at chinablack was!!! juz cldnt wait to get there n have fun man. liping, celin n i left early to make up n all... met up wif the rest... n yes~! i'm queueing at chinablack. n yes~! i finally reached the front. n no..... i found out i forgot to bring my IC~!! ARGH. n no... they refused to accept concession cards. so how? wad cld i do but go home? so in the end shared a cab home wif lionel. he left too.. coz he budget, dun wanna waste. as usual. HAIZ. GEK SIM AHHHH. =( owells.. face the bright side, at least i can wake up on time to meet bun tmr. YEA! =) haha.
busy day tmr also. n the day aft tmr. tmr... aft meeting bun, gotta go for SJ zone meeting. fri? aftnoon go back gess for SJ, evening go for piano, nite go for SJ ANCO meeting. busy~! busy~!
met up wif ivonny yest. boy did i miss her~! she was shopping, as usual, at clementi. had soo much to catch up. told her wad happened, gossipped... hehehe. =P
today's sooo hectic. super hectic. but i had fun still. met up wif the helpers n GLs in the DE club hse in the morning, slacked for awhile n proceeded to the auditorium. we were helping out in the DE orientation. gave out forms for the freshies. went crazy during the break. was cheering... saboing umar the bday boy... billy banja-ing... hehe. aft it all, slacked even more in the club hse. most of them went to orchard. booo~!! sooo sad, cldnt join them. made them promise tt they wun watch starwars, n tt wen i'm free, they will watch it wif me. HEHEHE~! soo bad. had a light lunch wif lionel, tong jue, wee soon n the freshies. den off i went for social dance.
went crazy during the dance.. hehe.. was singing the new DE cheer. they said nxt time they better prevent me frm going for animore camps. hahaha. but wad to do? i juz simply LOVE DE~! hehe. aft social dance, was the SOKA dance at boon lay. was freaking tired there man, juz cldnt wait to get home. but going home wasnt my plan for the day.. clubbing at chinablack was!!! juz cldnt wait to get there n have fun man. liping, celin n i left early to make up n all... met up wif the rest... n yes~! i'm queueing at chinablack. n yes~! i finally reached the front. n no..... i found out i forgot to bring my IC~!! ARGH. n no... they refused to accept concession cards. so how? wad cld i do but go home? so in the end shared a cab home wif lionel. he left too.. coz he budget, dun wanna waste. as usual. HAIZ. GEK SIM AHHHH. =( owells.. face the bright side, at least i can wake up on time to meet bun tmr. YEA! =) haha.
busy day tmr also. n the day aft tmr. tmr... aft meeting bun, gotta go for SJ zone meeting. fri? aftnoon go back gess for SJ, evening go for piano, nite go for SJ ANCO meeting. busy~! busy~!
Saturday, May 21, 2005
i'm back frm DE FOC~~!!!!! WOOohOOO!! SCYLLAS WOOOH~ SCYLLAS AAH~ SCYLLAS SCYLLAS IS THE BEST~!!! hahaha.. scyllas's my grp's name. ;P had been shouting sooo much in the camp tt i lost my voice man. sound like a man now. dun really talk for the time being, unless necessary, coz my voice totally suck. hehe.
hmm... the camp~ to be honest.. it aint well planned. there were loads of confusion. 1 main prob to tis was coz of the communication. the reception on sj island was super weak, causing the difficulty to communicate anione. saw kimiko screaming into the fone wif fustration n totally pitied her. n the GLs were given toooo little time to hang out wif their grp!! argh. everytime i tried to talk to them, or teach them a cheer or game or song, someone will be screaming, "GLs GATHER!!" argh. hate it wen i heard tt. i need more time wif my team! well.. but if i were in the freshies shoe, w/o knowing all the confusion n probs behind the scene, i tink i'll have fun. yep.
oooh ooh!!! i was the dead li xiang during MT nite. heheh!! had soooo much fun scaring them man. some even cried. hahaha!! they were suppose to ask me some qns on how i die... who killed me... bla bla. my face was painted totally white, wif a trickle of blood down frm my eye. den my hands were all painted bloody. n all thnx to my long finger nails.. i cld trail my hands down their hands. wahahah~! some gals screamed aft i touched them. song man~! haha.. i so bad. my grp members told me i super scary... umar told me his grp ppl said so too. wahah~! success~! wahaha.
jackson was my GL partner. he ahhh.. ok la.. can co-operate. but i tink coz we were not close, so he's not really comfortable being near me or hanging out wif me. once there's a chance, he'll hang out wif brandon. saw the other GLs being so close n felt kinda jealous. tried chatting wif him once in a while, did have a gd laugh sometimes, but cldnt really chat for long. quite sad. sumtimes we like look at each other, den kept quiet. argh.. super awkward. owells... but overall he's nice.. noe i got sore throat, pass me water to drink. =)
nxt camp is SJ ANCO training camp. i'm the disciplinary officer. HAIZ~!!! more shouting. hope i recover b4 it.
hmm... the camp~ to be honest.. it aint well planned. there were loads of confusion. 1 main prob to tis was coz of the communication. the reception on sj island was super weak, causing the difficulty to communicate anione. saw kimiko screaming into the fone wif fustration n totally pitied her. n the GLs were given toooo little time to hang out wif their grp!! argh. everytime i tried to talk to them, or teach them a cheer or game or song, someone will be screaming, "GLs GATHER!!" argh. hate it wen i heard tt. i need more time wif my team! well.. but if i were in the freshies shoe, w/o knowing all the confusion n probs behind the scene, i tink i'll have fun. yep.
oooh ooh!!! i was the dead li xiang during MT nite. heheh!! had soooo much fun scaring them man. some even cried. hahaha!! they were suppose to ask me some qns on how i die... who killed me... bla bla. my face was painted totally white, wif a trickle of blood down frm my eye. den my hands were all painted bloody. n all thnx to my long finger nails.. i cld trail my hands down their hands. wahahah~! some gals screamed aft i touched them. song man~! haha.. i so bad. my grp members told me i super scary... umar told me his grp ppl said so too. wahah~! success~! wahaha.
jackson was my GL partner. he ahhh.. ok la.. can co-operate. but i tink coz we were not close, so he's not really comfortable being near me or hanging out wif me. once there's a chance, he'll hang out wif brandon. saw the other GLs being so close n felt kinda jealous. tried chatting wif him once in a while, did have a gd laugh sometimes, but cldnt really chat for long. quite sad. sumtimes we like look at each other, den kept quiet. argh.. super awkward. owells... but overall he's nice.. noe i got sore throat, pass me water to drink. =)
nxt camp is SJ ANCO training camp. i'm the disciplinary officer. HAIZ~!!! more shouting. hope i recover b4 it.
Sunday, May 15, 2005
went clubbing wif pei ru glenn n yi hao yest. toked to yh for the first time. kinda realised tt he is quite gd looking, resembles a hk actor. sooooo happy to see pei ru!! was chatting away once i saw her. we had sooo much to catch up! i was sooo excited n happy tt i cldnt stop crapping. hehehe! told them alll kinds of lame jokes until they cannot tahan. haha. really laughed alot. hehe. went to cheekymonkey... quite ok i guess... felt really awkward at first coz it was my first time clubbing. den they hit the dance floor, slowly slowly... started to dance, gradually got into the mood. they played songs tt i really like man! sooo coool.. was singing damn loud. glenn n yh were sweating like mad, yh looked really cool. hee.
kor was at mohamed sultan too. saw him n his gf while having supper wif glenn n yh aft pr left. actually wanted to ton till the nxt morning, but glenn persuaded me to go home wif kor coz i needed to wake up early. so yep... went home. smelled damn bad man!! all the smoke n alcohol. cldnt wash off the odour wen i got home, but didnt bother coz i was too tired. went straight to slp. n woke up late the nxt morning! was supposed to meet lion at 8.30 at lakeside. woke up at arnd 8. thnk goodness glenn called n msged me arnd 7+, or else i'll slp till the aftnoon man.
joined the soka dance performance. was drawned to it wen i first went to watch lion pract. so yep. the ppl there very very nice. the dance was ok i guess... very very blur. but luckily i wasnt too far bhind time. vaguely picked up the dance moves. aft went home, met lion n lx at redhill, went to hougang n met the rest, den went to leslie's place to prep for our camp. we're to make tis wrist band for our own grp, abt 20. only did 2! aim to finish by tonight, den tmr nite can have a gd slp b4 the camp on tues. CANT WAIT!!
have a very very bad sore throat now man. freaking hoarse. sound like a man. further more i got a slight fever n cough. juz 3 days b4 the camp n i fall sick!! argh. better try my bez to get better. or else how to lead my grp?! hehehe..
kor was at mohamed sultan too. saw him n his gf while having supper wif glenn n yh aft pr left. actually wanted to ton till the nxt morning, but glenn persuaded me to go home wif kor coz i needed to wake up early. so yep... went home. smelled damn bad man!! all the smoke n alcohol. cldnt wash off the odour wen i got home, but didnt bother coz i was too tired. went straight to slp. n woke up late the nxt morning! was supposed to meet lion at 8.30 at lakeside. woke up at arnd 8. thnk goodness glenn called n msged me arnd 7+, or else i'll slp till the aftnoon man.
joined the soka dance performance. was drawned to it wen i first went to watch lion pract. so yep. the ppl there very very nice. the dance was ok i guess... very very blur. but luckily i wasnt too far bhind time. vaguely picked up the dance moves. aft went home, met lion n lx at redhill, went to hougang n met the rest, den went to leslie's place to prep for our camp. we're to make tis wrist band for our own grp, abt 20. only did 2! aim to finish by tonight, den tmr nite can have a gd slp b4 the camp on tues. CANT WAIT!!
have a very very bad sore throat now man. freaking hoarse. sound like a man. further more i got a slight fever n cough. juz 3 days b4 the camp n i fall sick!! argh. better try my bez to get better. or else how to lead my grp?! hehehe..
Friday, May 13, 2005
had been tinking y i reacted so much... n i cldnt get an ans. the feeling juz came, like it really mattered. but tinking back, it doesnt matter at all. its ppl's business... not mine.. everyone has their own view.. so yea... y the huge reaction?
had been rather busy wif camp tis days. in fact, i've been going to sch almost everyday. either for the dance, or props prep. went out wif them yest, suntec den orchard. met my family at paragon for dinner. accompanied my mom to search for a top n almost died frm boredom n exhaustion!! she went shop aft shop.. trying on tops aft tops... rejecting n rejecting. ARGH!! almost exploded. felt so terrible tt i stood in the middle of the shop, stoning, staring at the floor. the sales lady was starin at me like i was a lunatic. i almost turned into 1.
aniway, was in sch today, again, to prep my props. not really mine though, jack made it, but backed out of the camp, so gave it to me instead. aft tt, rushed home to change n went for piano. got nagged as usual. grade 7 scores are freaking difficult!! serious.. argh. aniway, aft tt, went to meet glenn. soooo long nv see him already. went to suntec. he told me abt his cambodia trip... even told me how to sae some stuff in their language. cool man! got to noe tt cambodia's taxi are actually on motorcycles. was like huh?! hehe.
glad to see him again... gonna see him tmr again!! haha.. going clubbing wif pei ru. cant wait!! =D
had been rather busy wif camp tis days. in fact, i've been going to sch almost everyday. either for the dance, or props prep. went out wif them yest, suntec den orchard. met my family at paragon for dinner. accompanied my mom to search for a top n almost died frm boredom n exhaustion!! she went shop aft shop.. trying on tops aft tops... rejecting n rejecting. ARGH!! almost exploded. felt so terrible tt i stood in the middle of the shop, stoning, staring at the floor. the sales lady was starin at me like i was a lunatic. i almost turned into 1.
aniway, was in sch today, again, to prep my props. not really mine though, jack made it, but backed out of the camp, so gave it to me instead. aft tt, rushed home to change n went for piano. got nagged as usual. grade 7 scores are freaking difficult!! serious.. argh. aniway, aft tt, went to meet glenn. soooo long nv see him already. went to suntec. he told me abt his cambodia trip... even told me how to sae some stuff in their language. cool man! got to noe tt cambodia's taxi are actually on motorcycles. was like huh?! hehe.
glad to see him again... gonna see him tmr again!! haha.. going clubbing wif pei ru. cant wait!! =D
Thursday, May 12, 2005
love love love~! ARGH! wads wif love man?! went blog surfing, n i read all kinds of ppl going crazy over love... being hurt by love... n somehow, the more i read, the more irritated i got. read tt tis guy hurt a gd fren, n anger rose up in me, juz a little though. angry wif him for hurting her, angry tt she have to suffer... y am i feeling so much? nxt read hakim's blog on loving his gf n i kinda got irritated. for the past 5 yrs of noeing him, i had nv once seen him single, always having a gf one aft another. claiming tt he loves someone one aft another. boy does he have loads of "hearts" to give out. y cant he take all tis strength n time to concentrate more on his studies?
i'm so tired. want sch to reopen. need something to keep my mind occupied.
i'm so tired. want sch to reopen. need something to keep my mind occupied.
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
mind rather blank tis days. going by the days juz reacting to wad comes to me, den ending it without a sense of satisfaction, or consideration. which is unlike whom i used to be, wen every single small event will run thru my mind, having loads of comments, n finally at night, alone in my room, i'll scan thru the day. weird hobby i have, but yes, tts wad i used to do.
as for now, merely re-collecting wad happened is a difficult task. guess every single brain cell had been burned out during sch n my body is recuperating, so i'm using as little brain cell as possible unconciously. O_0 -CRAP-
NEWAY!! tots DO go thru my mind, esp during the dance n cheer meeting today. firstly... BOREDOM. what am i doing in tis meeting aniway? i'm juz a vice qm. freddy told me the day b4 tt they cant make it without the vice qm. like.. huh??? having the qm there is enuff. further more while they were discussing abt cleaning up the club hse, the decisions were given to the qm, so wad was i doing there? most of the time during the meeting, all i did was crap in my notebook or add in some comments occasionally. den marcus asked us qnses on y we joined the club. cairu mentioned tt she find the ppl in the club easier to click wif, n tt frm wad she heard frm others (God knows who), the members in other clubs arent as nice. n hey!! missing social dance was wad i felt immediately. i dun hate them, i still treat them like how i treat ani other frens, but i juz dun feel the sincerity they have to me, do they even have it? their greeting they gave were juz a feeble hi, like someone forced them to. or mayb its juz me. guess i'm juz not willing to allow their sincerity(if there is) into my heart. *shrug*
summary: i dun feel belonged.
i cant wait for the DE camp. looking forward to it like crazy. saw the list of helpers n only lionel n i frm DARCH 04/03 are going. there used to be megat, jon, hid, jack, ian, irwin, etc. boy are they going to miss the fun. was a little disappointed tt they wrote down their name, brought up leslie's hopes, but backed out later. owells, they got their reasons. i'm juz glad i'm still in. =)
i've been paired up wif jackson to be group leaders.. hmm.. still wondering who he is..
quit my job tis morning. was quite shocked wen i felt like i lost a bf. stared into space while the feeling swelled thru my heart. had been long since i felt tis way. but aft it went off, there was a huge rush of relieve. "YES!!! I'M FREEEEEE!!!" haha
as for now, merely re-collecting wad happened is a difficult task. guess every single brain cell had been burned out during sch n my body is recuperating, so i'm using as little brain cell as possible unconciously. O_0 -CRAP-
NEWAY!! tots DO go thru my mind, esp during the dance n cheer meeting today. firstly... BOREDOM. what am i doing in tis meeting aniway? i'm juz a vice qm. freddy told me the day b4 tt they cant make it without the vice qm. like.. huh??? having the qm there is enuff. further more while they were discussing abt cleaning up the club hse, the decisions were given to the qm, so wad was i doing there? most of the time during the meeting, all i did was crap in my notebook or add in some comments occasionally. den marcus asked us qnses on y we joined the club. cairu mentioned tt she find the ppl in the club easier to click wif, n tt frm wad she heard frm others (God knows who), the members in other clubs arent as nice. n hey!! missing social dance was wad i felt immediately. i dun hate them, i still treat them like how i treat ani other frens, but i juz dun feel the sincerity they have to me, do they even have it? their greeting they gave were juz a feeble hi, like someone forced them to. or mayb its juz me. guess i'm juz not willing to allow their sincerity(if there is) into my heart. *shrug*
summary: i dun feel belonged.
i cant wait for the DE camp. looking forward to it like crazy. saw the list of helpers n only lionel n i frm DARCH 04/03 are going. there used to be megat, jon, hid, jack, ian, irwin, etc. boy are they going to miss the fun. was a little disappointed tt they wrote down their name, brought up leslie's hopes, but backed out later. owells, they got their reasons. i'm juz glad i'm still in. =)
i've been paired up wif jackson to be group leaders.. hmm.. still wondering who he is..
quit my job tis morning. was quite shocked wen i felt like i lost a bf. stared into space while the feeling swelled thru my heart. had been long since i felt tis way. but aft it went off, there was a huge rush of relieve. "YES!!! I'M FREEEEEE!!!" haha
Saturday, May 07, 2005
ooh.. there she goes running out of my hse, wif my bro running aft. sumtimes, or rather often, i wonder, "y love wen it hurts?"
1 gender always claims tt the opp sex is nutting but trouble. the battle of sexes is always seen happening arnd us. guys claiming tt gals are not as gd as they are, gals blaming guys for not being up to their standard. but y do we always end up being drawn to the "significant other"? n end up making life difficult?
i'm not saying coupling is wrong. we do need to reproduce aniway. but its totally useless getting into tis unnecessary mess at a young age. or wen u do not see urself getting married wif the other. wen u feel sumthing is wrong, it will always be wrong, no matter how high the fidelity.
i sat watching tv wif my bro n his gf once, n boooy did i feel uncomfortable. it was not coz they were being lovey-doveying, but she was scolding/nagging him for small trivial reasons. i felt extremely weird. how can my bro actually stay wif her for 2 mnths+?! i felt extremely caged up for him. the word "shut up" often rang in my head. yes, i read tt he is deeply in love wif her, n vice versa, but being in a relationship does not rely only on tis, it depends on the ppl arnd too. had it ever occur to them tt their quarrells or unhappiness affect their family n frens too? she's nice to me, i totally appreciate it, but the way she treats my bro juz turns me off. owells, it all depends on fate. i wish them the best of luck.
1 gender always claims tt the opp sex is nutting but trouble. the battle of sexes is always seen happening arnd us. guys claiming tt gals are not as gd as they are, gals blaming guys for not being up to their standard. but y do we always end up being drawn to the "significant other"? n end up making life difficult?
i'm not saying coupling is wrong. we do need to reproduce aniway. but its totally useless getting into tis unnecessary mess at a young age. or wen u do not see urself getting married wif the other. wen u feel sumthing is wrong, it will always be wrong, no matter how high the fidelity.
i sat watching tv wif my bro n his gf once, n boooy did i feel uncomfortable. it was not coz they were being lovey-doveying, but she was scolding/nagging him for small trivial reasons. i felt extremely weird. how can my bro actually stay wif her for 2 mnths+?! i felt extremely caged up for him. the word "shut up" often rang in my head. yes, i read tt he is deeply in love wif her, n vice versa, but being in a relationship does not rely only on tis, it depends on the ppl arnd too. had it ever occur to them tt their quarrells or unhappiness affect their family n frens too? she's nice to me, i totally appreciate it, but the way she treats my bro juz turns me off. owells, it all depends on fate. i wish them the best of luck.
Friday, May 06, 2005
back frm da camp. supposed to go for piano but totally forgotten abt it. argh.. missed 2 wks.. n the exams are nearing. silly me.
planned to wake up at 7 n reach sch arnd 8+, but ended up waking at 9+. called lion n found out he's still slping. heard tt he had diarrhoea last nite too... it muz be the food. coz christina n tis other guy had it too. aniway, reached sch at arnd 10+ wen they juz finished the telematch n were cleaning up. saw them all dirty n wet, den they saw me dry n clean.. ey claimed no one can be dry.. so sabo me... poured water.. made me squat at a drain, n rained water down frm a window. not enuff... ppl came n wiped the flour n egg on my shirt... stupid jason.. cleaned his arm on my tee. =( den we went to wash up. had a briefing, den lion came.. for nutting!! coz aft tt was lunch, singing session n debriefing. told lion tt i found banny really cute during the singing session.. he didnt tink so. ai ya, guys have a diff opinion. hee. aft everything, we went to play pool. for awhile only. less than an hr.
i really siao already. went to frenster to search on banny. hee!! i'm such a stalker!! lolx. found out he's MM's president n council chair. like super li hai lor!! omg... such a successful person. cheerful, humorous, caring.. n plus he's cute!! was even in a commercial for canon pixma printer. ahhh. hahahha. but hey, i have no chance wadsoeva to be even close frens wif him, other than during the camp. i have no intentions to. he's juz a pretty face to keep me entertained. hahaha! siao already. hmm.. mayb juz frens? hahaha!!! i feel so pervertic! =XxXxX
cant wait for the FO camp. mayb he'll be there? HAHA.. nah.. i juz cant wait to have fun during the camp. =)
planned to wake up at 7 n reach sch arnd 8+, but ended up waking at 9+. called lion n found out he's still slping. heard tt he had diarrhoea last nite too... it muz be the food. coz christina n tis other guy had it too. aniway, reached sch at arnd 10+ wen they juz finished the telematch n were cleaning up. saw them all dirty n wet, den they saw me dry n clean.. ey claimed no one can be dry.. so sabo me... poured water.. made me squat at a drain, n rained water down frm a window. not enuff... ppl came n wiped the flour n egg on my shirt... stupid jason.. cleaned his arm on my tee. =( den we went to wash up. had a briefing, den lion came.. for nutting!! coz aft tt was lunch, singing session n debriefing. told lion tt i found banny really cute during the singing session.. he didnt tink so. ai ya, guys have a diff opinion. hee. aft everything, we went to play pool. for awhile only. less than an hr.
i really siao already. went to frenster to search on banny. hee!! i'm such a stalker!! lolx. found out he's MM's president n council chair. like super li hai lor!! omg... such a successful person. cheerful, humorous, caring.. n plus he's cute!! was even in a commercial for canon pixma printer. ahhh. hahahha. but hey, i have no chance wadsoeva to be even close frens wif him, other than during the camp. i have no intentions to. he's juz a pretty face to keep me entertained. hahaha! siao already. hmm.. mayb juz frens? hahaha!!! i feel so pervertic! =XxXxX
cant wait for the FO camp. mayb he'll be there? HAHA.. nah.. i juz cant wait to have fun during the camp. =)
Thursday, May 05, 2005
slpy. very very slpy. finally able to use the laptop in my room w/o disturbance. juz came back frm prep camp. it ends tmr, but came back instead. gonna join them again tmr morning. told my mom i'll be home today, gotta keep my promise. shant work tmr, though i didnt apply for leave. its a sucky job aniway, no pt going for it.
prep camp started yest. coooll, fun! reminded me of my cadet times, but less tough, n more fun. totally enjoyed it. glad to be able to go abt juz listening to instructions n following em juz to make the leaders satisfied, though it gets a little too rough n tiring, but making decisions n giving out instructions is much more difficult, so i'm juz glad. somehow, since i'm now a sj officer, i cld put myself in their shoes, while at the same time enjoy the feeling of being a helper. which was soo not me wen i was a cadet. all i cld tink was "how i wish i'm in their shoes n their's in mine""how i wish i can give them commands instead""wen can i be the leaders?""argh! y the hell muz they make things difficult for us?!" ahhh... now i noe. being a leader is not juz going abt giving instructions n making things difficult, there's much more to it, n there is a reason behind wadeva they do, which is much much much tougher. somehow i wish i cld juz go back to being a cadet again. =
well.. the past 1/1/2 days were nutting much but games aft games, cheers aft cheers. there was the night walk. 4 of the helpers (incl. me!!) were choosen out of the 16+ helpers to act as "freshies" to experience the walk. the rest were the "scarers" O_0 argh. was pretty freaked out at first. esp at tis "hell" station... was sooo freaked out tt i started wailing juz to pull the feeling out of me. ben had a shock. was grabbing his hand like mad.. hee.. but he very protective... helped block the "ghosts" frm me. hee. =P very cute n humorous guy. further more he was really brave n initiative.. heeeeeeeeee =P~~~ ANIWAY, the rest of the walk was nutting much, coz i cld figure out who was acting as wad. haha.
got an injured little toe on my right leg!! argh. painfullll... stupid lionel. haha. our team won his team over a game, so we got to pour water onto them. den the all-wet, drenching lionel came over to hug me!! n ended up kicking my little toe. -_- now its so freaking red n swollen.. n i can barely walk properly. n... my mom told me to go to a sinsei, noooooooooo!! i'm petrified of em!!
oh, n another sucky thing. i was suffering frm a quite severe diarrhoea. had to run for toilets in the middle of games. argh. felt terrible man. if not for tis, i wld definitely enjoy the camp. =(
oh man.. i'm exhausted.
prep camp started yest. coooll, fun! reminded me of my cadet times, but less tough, n more fun. totally enjoyed it. glad to be able to go abt juz listening to instructions n following em juz to make the leaders satisfied, though it gets a little too rough n tiring, but making decisions n giving out instructions is much more difficult, so i'm juz glad. somehow, since i'm now a sj officer, i cld put myself in their shoes, while at the same time enjoy the feeling of being a helper. which was soo not me wen i was a cadet. all i cld tink was "how i wish i'm in their shoes n their's in mine""how i wish i can give them commands instead""wen can i be the leaders?""argh! y the hell muz they make things difficult for us?!" ahhh... now i noe. being a leader is not juz going abt giving instructions n making things difficult, there's much more to it, n there is a reason behind wadeva they do, which is much much much tougher. somehow i wish i cld juz go back to being a cadet again. =
well.. the past 1/1/2 days were nutting much but games aft games, cheers aft cheers. there was the night walk. 4 of the helpers (incl. me!!) were choosen out of the 16+ helpers to act as "freshies" to experience the walk. the rest were the "scarers" O_0 argh. was pretty freaked out at first. esp at tis "hell" station... was sooo freaked out tt i started wailing juz to pull the feeling out of me. ben had a shock. was grabbing his hand like mad.. hee.. but he very protective... helped block the "ghosts" frm me. hee. =P very cute n humorous guy. further more he was really brave n initiative.. heeeeeeeeee =P~~~ ANIWAY, the rest of the walk was nutting much, coz i cld figure out who was acting as wad. haha.
got an injured little toe on my right leg!! argh. painfullll... stupid lionel. haha. our team won his team over a game, so we got to pour water onto them. den the all-wet, drenching lionel came over to hug me!! n ended up kicking my little toe. -_- now its so freaking red n swollen.. n i can barely walk properly. n... my mom told me to go to a sinsei, noooooooooo!! i'm petrified of em!!
oh, n another sucky thing. i was suffering frm a quite severe diarrhoea. had to run for toilets in the middle of games. argh. felt terrible man. if not for tis, i wld definitely enjoy the camp. =(
oh man.. i'm exhausted.
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
yaawwn. slpy slpy slpy. first work today. jack late.. HAR!! still tell me cannot late. hee.
work was ok i guess. juz tt its pretty tiring. scanned thru 4 blocks but cld only manage 8 cards. further more each block was abt 26 floors. kinda reminded me of the door to door sales for ice cream. thnk god we dun hafta push a cart. hee. jack partnered wif me. sumtimes gave me a really amusing look. so funny wan.. he got all kinda ppl. lolx. n he's afraid of dogs!! ahahaha! lolx
msged glenn.. he's back frm cambodia!!! ahhhh.. miss him miss him!! cant wait to meet him lor.. but he starting sch le, n i got job, plus the camps. tink difficult la. ai ya.. if we can meet confirm meet wan. =)
buv n bun say wanna meet me... tink got no time already la. owells...
shld i stop work? shld i?! kept tinking abt those irritating sales person whom i really hated. n now i'm 1 of em!! parents wanted me to work for em. said the job is useless... coz got no basic pay. took leave for 2 days. YEA!! hehe.. coz of the prep camp. argh, tired. tired!!!!
work was ok i guess. juz tt its pretty tiring. scanned thru 4 blocks but cld only manage 8 cards. further more each block was abt 26 floors. kinda reminded me of the door to door sales for ice cream. thnk god we dun hafta push a cart. hee. jack partnered wif me. sumtimes gave me a really amusing look. so funny wan.. he got all kinda ppl. lolx. n he's afraid of dogs!! ahahaha! lolx
msged glenn.. he's back frm cambodia!!! ahhhh.. miss him miss him!! cant wait to meet him lor.. but he starting sch le, n i got job, plus the camps. tink difficult la. ai ya.. if we can meet confirm meet wan. =)
buv n bun say wanna meet me... tink got no time already la. owells...
shld i stop work? shld i?! kept tinking abt those irritating sales person whom i really hated. n now i'm 1 of em!! parents wanted me to work for em. said the job is useless... coz got no basic pay. took leave for 2 days. YEA!! hehe.. coz of the prep camp. argh, tired. tired!!!!
Monday, May 02, 2005
damn it. stop msging me!!!! "gd morning jaz!! hope u have a great day!!" "gd nite jaz!! sweet drms!!" -_-""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" argh! "eh juz wanna ask u, wad kinda guys u like?" no one like u! argh. fug off.
juz wanna vent some anger....
juz wanna vent some anger....