always.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

supposed to be back at work now.. but i'm soo not motivated to do so. had been slacking since afternoon.. having to sit down n work for onli abt 10 mins or so, den walking back to the couch to slouch. its bad.. the feeling sux... i need some motivation. where was the motivation i had b4 the hols? wen i cld work till late the nxt morning?

had been tinking soo much. too much. words, visions, pictures etc running in n out of my mind. there were even more wen i tried doing my work. mostly depressing.. in fact.. they all were.. wanted to slp n take my mind off it all. wads wrong? wads happening? cried aft bath last nite.. stood in front of the mirror n started tinking.. den emotions came.. including the tears. wanted to spill em all out to someone.. but who? no one... no one can take tt much information i keep inside. wanna call him.. but was afraid he's at work. juz cldnt find anione else.

dance yest was utterly depressing. cldnt rem the steps, cldnt keep up wif the rest... felt like a fool tumbling abt making ugly moves. cldnt look at myself in the mirror, coz all i saw was ugly bodylines, an ugly footwork.. everything abt myself was ugly.

y do tis have to happen wen subm's juz arnd the corner? wanna keep my mind clear n conc.

miss him like hell.. but aparently i hafta get used to it..


Sok Yee aka Jacelyn Murdoch Biomedical Science soxy_gal@hotmail.com; jac_soxy@yahoo.com.sg 20031987 Pisces Amalina Bertz Buvan Chai Desmond Glenn Harky Heidi Irwin Ivonny Jiayi Jiaying Lionel Lionel Artsy Fartsy Melvin Pearly Pearlyn Sab Tian Wen Virly Virly 2 Zakiah August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 May 2011 December 2011 April 2012 May 2013 Bituwin - template Dementee - image Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.	Wednesday, June 28, 2006 supposed to be back at work now.. but i'm soo not motivated to do so. had been slacking since afternoon.. having to sit down n work for onli abt 10 mins or so, den walking back to the couch to slouch. its bad.. the feeling sux... i need some motivation. where was the motivation i had b4 the hols? wen i cld work till late the nxt morning? had been tinking soo much. too much. words, visions, pictures etc running in n out of my mind. there were even more wen i tried doing my work. mostly depressing.. in fact.. they all were.. wanted to slp n take my mind off it all. wads wrong? wads happening? cried aft bath last nite.. stood in front of the mirror n started tinking.. den emotions came.. including the tears. wanted to spill em all out to someone.. but who? no one... no one can take tt much information i keep inside. wanna call him.. but was afraid he's at work. juz cldnt find anione else. dance yest was utterly depressing. cldnt rem the steps, cldnt keep up wif the rest... felt like a fool tumbling abt making ugly moves. cldnt look at myself in the mirror, coz all i saw was ugly bodylines, an ugly footwork.. everything abt myself was ugly. y do tis have to happen wen subm's juz arnd the corner? wanna keep my mind clear n conc. miss him like hell.. but aparently i hafta get used to it.. 6/28/2006 10:29:00 PM ·